'Se�or, cond�ceme hasta donde me necesites'
Monday, August 2, 2010
*Angelique Ruhi-Lopez
��T� quieres que yo haga qu�, cu�ndo?�
Si esta es nuestra respuesta incr�dula a Dios cuando, como padres ocupados, �l nos llama a servirle y a realizar apostolado en la Iglesia, tanto la Iglesia como nosotros mismos perdemos un verdadero regalo.
De acuerdo con Christifideles Laici, la Exhortaci�n Apost�lica Post Sinodal de Su Santidad Juan Pablo II Sobre la Vocaci�n y la Misi�n de los Laicos en la Iglesia y en el Mundo, emitida en 1988, cada uno de nosotros tiene la responsabilidad de responder al llamado a la misi�n y desarrollar los dones que hemos recibido, al compartirlos en la familia, el lugar de trabajo, la comunidad c�vica, y la parroquia o di�cesis. Sin embargo, los ministerios, oficios y roles asumidos por los laicos, deben ejercerse �en conformidad con su espec�fica vocaci�n laical� (Christifideles Laici, n�m. 23).
Esto me recuerda que, a pesar de mi gran deseo de ir como misionera a otro pa�s, estoy llamada a participar en ministerios apropiados a mi estado de vida actual, como esposa y madre de mis cuatro hijos peque�os. Mi esposo y yo dirigimos ejercicios espirituales y retiros de preparaci�n matrimonial que, por ejemplo, s�lo requieren que dejemos a nuestros ni�os con familiares por unas pocas horas o por unos pocos d�as, como m�ximo. Tambi�n creemos que es importante dar un ejemplo a nuestros ni�os e involucrarlos en el servicio, como en las campa�as anuales de alimentos para los trabajadores agr�colas durante la �poca de Acci�n de Gracias. Desde edad temprana, aprenden que estamos llamados a la opci�n preferencial por los pobres.
A pesar de que, como padres, tenemos restricciones de tiempo, hay muchos ministerios que nos ayudan a incluir a nuestros ni�os o a limitar nuestro tiempo lejos de ellos. Algunos ejemplos son la ense�anza de la educaci�n religiosa, RICA o clases de planificaci�n natural; ser lectores o ministros extraordinarios de la Sagrada Comuni�n (si tenemos que asistir de todas maneras, �por qu� no servir mientras estamos all�?); servir en los albergues y comedores de beneficencia; ayudar en los esfuerzos misioneros locales o a favor de la vida; y asistir en la preparaci�n sacramental. En fin, las opciones son ilimitadas.
Cada persona o familia debe discernir d�nde est� llamada a servir, dependiendo de c�mo sus talentos, intereses y limitaciones de tiempo puedan cumplir con algunas necesidades espec�ficas. Adem�s del servicio inconmensurable que podemos ofrecer a quienes tienen necesidades f�sicas, emocionales o espirituales, cuando servimos tambi�n podemos realizar apostolado hacia nosotros mismos, ya que a menudo es m�s f�cil permanecer atrapados en nuestros mundos, que salir y ayudar a los dem�s.
Pero todo debe ser en moderaci�n. Nuestro servicio en la Iglesia nunca debe tomar prioridad sobre nuestro servicio principal en nuestra iglesia dom�stica. Y si, a trav�s de la oraci�n y el discernimiento, determinamos que no estamos llamados a realizar apostolado fuera de nuestros hogares en un tiempo determinado, Dios sabe que primero lo realizamos con nuestras familias. Juan Pablo II dijo que �el ministerio de evangelizaci�n de los padres cristianos es original e insustituible� (Familiaris Consortio 53).
Sin embargo, mientras cambia el tiempo y los ni�os crecen, la oraci�n continua de un padre sobre su ministerio debe ser: �Se�or, cond�ceme hasta donde me necesites�.
Comments from readers
Thank you for a very thoughtful and needed post. We need to refocus our attention on service instead of productivity. It seems that we have become contaminated by the world's accounting system. There is a frightening tendency among many people, not just Catholics, to measure the value of service in terms of numbers and achievements. We have forgotten that Jesus began his ministry alone. By the time that he ascended to the Father, he had attracted only a handful of people. Many are frightened of service because they believe that they have to accomplish great things in large numbers. Nothing can be further from the truth. The greatest form of service is the smallest thing done with great love.
We need to bring this back into the home and into our parishes. I am often amazed and concerned about those who go to the extremes. There are those secular men and women who extend themselves to the point that they are absentee parents and spouses. Then there are the ones who never extend themselves because they can only spare a few minutes a week and believe that this is not enough. They do nothing rather than do a little bit with great love. Like the rich young man in the Gospels, they walk away disappointed believing that they can't do more than what they already do.
However, God is not a timekeeper or an accountant. He does not keep track of the number of ministries in which we engage, nor does he count the number of souls that we reach. We need not go to the extreme of sinning against justice by abandoning our families or the sin of despair believing that we have nothing to offer. Every person has something to offer. We have to learn from the widow who donated the few cents that she had.
Finally, we must remember that the family is the primary school of holiness. The perfection of charity begins there. I'm glad to see that you focused this so well for our readers. Thank you for your witness and your encouragement.
What a beautiful and well written article! I have forwarded it to the Women's Emmaus group at St. Augustine Church and Catholic Student Center which is my parish because the message it contains is one that we need to be reminded of frequently. Your mom keeps me posted every once in a while of the wonderful things that you and your husband continue to do. May God continue to bless you and your family abundantly and may He continue to increase in us all that we are lacking so that we may serve Him well. With love, Lilly (Ricky Pollo's mom)
I get the impression that many people these days, also among Catholics, are somewhat misled into thinking that for charity to matter and to be appreciated, it must be institutionalized. They highly esteem participation in special projects aimed at financial support for various social causes, or collections of food and clothing, but they forget and almost neglect acts of charity performed in a most personal way at home, such as a mother's selfish work done on behalf of her children. Those same children would be homeless and highly "disadvantaged" if they didn�'t have the care of a devoted parent. Yet, our society holds in little esteem the work of parents. Mothers who care for their family are said to be "without work". The state does not contribute a single penny of relief to mothers of small children. Should the mother give up, the State would have to take over the care of such children: and the cost would be very high. I've heard of annual figures upwards from $40,000 per neglected child. How about giving each mother some relief, at least a few thousand dollars annually for her hard work? Institutional charity is very popular and lots of money is poured out to various organizations. But, curiously enough, nothing is given to families with small children. And yet, that is where the bulk of the hard work, the nitty-gritty of the building up the future of a nation takes place. As someone said: "in America, if a woman serves dinner to her family, she is said to be repressed, but if she serves dinner to total strangers in a restaurant, she is said to have a career." Perhaps, our goals are a bit mixed up.