Christmas gingerbread tradition a shared blessing

By Tom Tracy - Florida Catholic

Photography: TOM TRACY | FC

POMPANO BEACH | A timely blast of arctic air lent a suitable wintry atmosphere for a festive culinary gathering of friends around the rectory table at St. Gabriel Church.

For some 30 years during the Christmas season, Broward resident Dolores Hanley McDiarmid has baked an oversized gingerbread man from a secret recipe, bringing it to special children and adults in her life.

Along with her husband, John, McDiarmid and her guests throw a little party during which they decorate the gingerbread man with colored gels from the grocery store.

After the gingerbread man has been baked for 40 minutes to tender perfection, McDiarmid takes photos of everyone decorating it, and finally a family or group photo with the completely decorated gingerbread man to document the event.

On the most recent occasion, Irish tea and milk were poured — courtesy of St. Gabriel’s pastor, Father Liam Quinn — as a candle was placed near the gingerbread cake.

At Father Quinn’s instigation, the group then sang a half dozen Christmas carols and a “Happy Birthday” song to Jesus before devouring the Christmas treat and sharing stories and a little holiday gossip.

“When I was working with the State of Florida Division of Blind Services, I started to do the gingerbread tradition with some youngsters who were the daughters of my secretary, and we did that all the way until they were in college,” said McDiarmid, who attends St. John the Baptist Church in Fort Lauderdale.

“The batter goes into the pan, we wait forty minutes and I take it very carefully out of the pan, let him cool off and we decorate him. The ingredients are a secret, but what makes it special is the labor of love,” said McDiarmid, who keeps detailed notes about each year’s event.

“Back in the 1980s I saw the gingerbread pan and that is when I started doing it,” she said.

McDiarmid has done the gingerbread man tradition for other friends and family, for a local Jewish couple, and mostly recently, on Dec. 22, for Father Quinn and two very special youngsters, Ashley and Tiffany Hayes – McDiarmid is their godmother.

The youths’ mother, Kate, was blind and died of a terminal illness shortly after formally joining the Catholic Church through the Rite of Christian Initiation in 2015. Their father likewise died shortly after their mother, leaving the girls in the care of their grandmother, Debbie, and grandfather, Richard.

A member of All Saints Parish, the girls’ mother had taught Braille at the Lighthouse of Broward, whose mission is to enhance the independence, productivity, and dignity of children and adults who are blind or visually impaired. The family had grown fond of their pastor at All Saints, Father Quinn, who gave spiritual counsel to the youths after their mother’s passing.

“The girls are so excited to be able to share this tradition with him. As I was reflecting on this I thought how Father Quinn has been a lifeline to my goddaughters,” McDiarmid said, noting that priests too need support and continuity of friendships when they take on a new assignment in a new community.

“During this Advent season, while we wait for our Lord to come on Christmas, I thought that sharing our Christmas tradition with Father Quinn would be a beautiful Advent activity for all of us,” McDiarmid said.

“Priests need our support especially when they are becoming adjusted to a new parish. This is about being flexible with our cultural traditions and sharing them, especially if it means bringing joy to another human being,” she said.

McDiarmid and her husband have no children of their own. She said watching their “adopted grandchildren” grow and develop over the years warms their hearts. The children call them “Grandma Dolores” and “GrandPaPa John.”

“It is a very special time of year for me, and part of my gift to them: that continuity in a relationship. And the continuity is a blessing. Not having children of our own, God has let us experience that as closely as we can. God’s hand is seen when you are open and you let that happen,” McDiarmid said.

“The saying is that in giving you receive, but when I started to do this I have gotten back a gazillion times the satisfaction of giving,” she added.

For his part, Father Quinn, his Irish setter Niall at his side and his guitar on his lap, noted that he is adjusting to his first Christmas season at his new parish, which hasn’t had a change in pastoral leadership in some 14 years. Changes and adjustments take time for everybody, he noted.

“Dolores is a very nice person. To grow is to change and to change often is to become perfect, so expanding this tradition is making that even richer,” he said.